As many are counting down to the beginning of a new year, how are you managing today? I want to check-in on you. Are you feeling overwhelmed by creating an unforgettable holiday for your family? Are you feeling a little down because you won’t be able to spend the holidays surrounded by friends and family? Are you grieving the loss of someone you loved so dear or loss of any kind during this extraordinary year?
If you can answer yes to any or all of these questions, please know you are not alone. So many women are in the same space as you and it’s ok to express how you feel. There are all types of trending data on anxiety and depression rates women experience during the holidays, however, this year has been unlike any other and brings on additional stressors.
Parent’s Today published an article on How to Handle Holiday Stress Triggers and they identified a few that I am aligned with.
- Supermom Meltdown - Always suiting up and then meltdown when it becomes too much.
- Keeping up Appearances - Consistently trying to top someone else or even yourself until it wears you down.
- Unhappy Families - Co-parenting, divorce, and dealing with blended families for some is not pleasurable and you have to endure sometimes for the sake of your children.
If any or all of these is you, it’s ok. The greatest gift you can give yourself is identifying there is a trigger and preparing on how you choose to handle those triggers with a plan.
I can relate to each of these scenarios, but during those days I thought maybe I was the only one. I just want to witness to you, that no you are not alone and I want to encourage you to pause and focus on enjoying the moments instead of focusing on the overall outcome. If you sit at the moment and be present, you will find the overall experience will be far greater than you could have imagined. Put down your phones and other devices. Turn on some music or watch a warming movie. When in the presence of others, be intentional to focus on engaging with them, it will mean more than you know. Not just to you but to the others who have the greatest opportunity of enjoying you.
Center yourself in gratitude. If you stay grounded in gratefulness it will keep you motivated and encouraged and could inspire you to encourage others. A great exercise is writing down each morning 2-3 things you are grateful for, this exercise will never get old. In fact, you will find days you can’t stop writing.
You deserve to extend grace to yourself. No one is perfect as much as we strive to mature and grow. And guess what, I have a secret, you are doing an even greater job than you will ever give yourself credit for. So know that if it isn’t perfect, you are still incredible.
Here at Single Mom Inspired, I recognize and know from experience there are additional layers added to the plate of the single moms, who are pulling it together and might not have a partner to share a portion of the weight. I just want you to know you are AMAZING and I am giving you a standing ovation.
Sometimes we just need to share our thoughts, maybe you just need a plan. Wherever you are on your journey, just know I am here to support you and at any time,
No matter how you started this week, I pray you finish strong.
And don’t forget, you are Fearless, you have Purpose, You are God’s Gem.
Until next time - Yolanda
Bibliography n.d. https://www.todaysparent.com/family/how-to-handle-the-top-five-holiday-stress-triggers/.
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